but you have aids!

This essay by a doctor was posted in the NY Times a while ago, but I still feel compelled to post about it.

Here is one of the funniest things I have read, online or not, fiction or not, ever:

A few years ago, a young woman waited patiently to be seen in our office after hours. She was a patient of one of my colleagues, but she couldn’t wait for their scheduled appointment; she needed to see someone right away.

“I’m worried I have Lyme disease,” she said. “I have all the symptoms. I think I need to be treated.”

“But you have AIDS,” I said.

“I’m tired and weak and I have fevers and sweats. I’ve lost my appetite. I can’t think straight. I’m losing so much weight!”

She had seen a TV news report on Lyme disease, and then she had checked the Internet. All her symptoms were right there.

“But you have AIDS,” I said. “And you don’t want to take meds. That’s why you’re feeling so bad.”

“I’m really scared about Lyme disease,” she said. “I really need to get treated.”

“If you want to be scared, how about that untreated AIDS of yours?”

Hahahahahahahah! “How about that untreated AIDS of yours?”

Oh wait, there’s an epilogue too:

Eventually she coerced my colleague into testing her for Lyme disease and treating her despite negative tests. Then she decided her symptoms might actually be due to a brain tumor, instead. And so it went, until she died of AIDS.

Enough said.

(This post originally written 02-November-2005)