alex chiang: web 6.0

Way back when, during the days of yore, when we were younger, thinner, and better looking, I was hanging out at Jake’s house, not really doing anything in particular, when all of a sudden, we heard a loud “Aarrrgh!” from downstairs.

Jake and I looked at each other in silent confusion. A minute later, Jake’s older brother Ian comes wandering upstairs with a sewing needle (with thread through the eye) stuck in his ear. Apparently, Ian felt the need to pierce his own ear.

Another Ian fact that may seem completely random at this point, but is absolutely crucial to our story is that Ian had a bad accident skiing when we were all in 7th or 8th grade. He hit a tree and was incapacitated for quite some time. I figure most of us already know this, but just in case you forgot, you’re now reminded.

In any case, I’m starting to babble. On with story of my weekend!

I went snowboarding this weekend. The day started out with kinda crappy hardpacked conditions, but a steady snow ensured that we had about 6″ of fresh powder to play in. If you’ve never skiied or snowboarded in powder, you haven’t lived. It was, in a word, epic.

During the course of our frolicking, we decided to frolick amongst the trees. Now I am a decent snowboarder. Not great, but not sucky either. I was having an ok day and figured I could handle the trees.

Maybe not.

Kinda out of control, I ended up slamming into a tree at some decent speed and smashed the entire left side of my face into the trunk. Dazed, i sat there for a while collecting my thoughts. A few minutes later, I managed to escape the evil woods.

My friend Heidi was waiting for me and here’s how the conversation went:

• H: Dude — you’re bleeding.
• A: Really?
• H: Dude — You’re bleeding a LOT.
• A: Hmm.
• H: [grabbing ear and looking closer] Dude — I can see through your EAR.
• A: [triumphantly] I’ve out-Ian’ed Ian!
• H: [confused] What? You’re delirious.
• A: I rule!
• H: We should bring you to the ski patrol.

So yeah — I hit a tree while skiing and pierced my own ear, but I did them both at the same time. Take that, Ian.