alex chiang: web 6.0

There’s a lot of dead time when traveling (one can’t always be on
the internet, ya know). Knowing this, I brought along a suitably
thick novel with which to pass the time, thinking that it would
last me for two and a half months. Ha!

Right — so I’ve done a LOT of reading thus far and have read a
bunch of books. Just for the hell of it, here’s what I’ve read
(roughly in chronological order).

Disclaimer: If you believe in Scientology, you probably shouldn’t read this email.

1. The Illuminatus Trilogy (Robert Shea and Robert Anton Wilson)
   

   This is a classically hilarious book about secret conspiracies propagated by secret societies. Lots of raunchy sex for no apparent reason other than to sell more copies of the book. The authors are my kinda guys.

2. The Fountainhead (Ayn Rand)
   

   Published in 1943, Rand takes 700 pages to say the following: Collectivism bad. Individualism good.

3. The Body Artist (Don DeLillo)
   

   Strange little novella written in DeLillo’s strange style. Or maybe it isn’t.

4. A Fall of Moondust (Arthur C. Clarke)
   

   Engineers and other people who enjoy solving problems with severe constraints will enjoy this sci-fi semi-thriller.

5. The Great Gatsby (F. Scott Fitzgerald)
   

   Man — I wish I had read this book in high school rather than the drearily boring Red Badge of Courage. The prose is straightforward, the plot is somewhat interesting, and the symbolism is much more obvious.

6. The Martian Chronicles (Ray Bradbury)
   

   Classic sci-fi novel. Gets better every time.

7. A Child Called “It” (Dave Pelzer)
   

   A surprisingly heartfelt autobiographical true story about one of the worst child abuse cases ever in California’s history.

8. Chasing Che (Patrick Symmes)
   

   Interesting story of Symmes’ attempt to recreate Che Guevara’s first motorcycle trip across South America.

9. Honor Among Thieves (Jeffrey Archer)
   

   Trashy novel about Saddam Hussein stealing the Declaration of Independence. I can’t believe this crap sells.

10. Chameleon (William Diehl)
    

    Another trashy novel about spies and ninjas and whatnot. At least this one’s written better than the piece of crap by Archer.

11. Night (Elie Wiesel)
    

    Excellent book based on Wiesel’s experience in Nazi concentration camps, and how he loses his god.

12. A Man In Full (Tom Wolfe)
    

    Another classic novel by Wolfe, who is one of the funniest and intelligent authors of our time. Ram yo’ *boo*ty!

13. Dianetics (L. Ron Hubbard)
    

    Sorry all you Scientologists out there, but this is the worst piece of shit that I’ve ever tried to read in my life. It’s nothing but pages upon pages of pseudoscience masquerading as real research written in a haughty authoritative manner of a quack. If this is one of the central books of Scientology, then your pseudo-religion sucks.

    My blood boiled so much after reading about these pseudo-equations and pseudo-computations and half-baked theories to the point where I had to stop reading after a mere 5 chapters.

14. Atlas Shrugged (Ayn Rand)
    

    Published 14 years after The Fountainhead, Rand takes another 1000 pages to say the following: Collectivism bad. Individualism good.

    Yes, yes, Ayn — we all know how much you hate Socialism and how much you venerate the individual Prime Mover and Generator. Did you really need John Galt to have SEVENTY consecutive pages of monologue to say that?

    Who is John Galt? Who cares? Who is your editor and why wasn’t he shot? And then after the funeral, dug up and shot
    again?

    That’s my story and I’m stickin’ to it.

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